“Bubba wants me? I like the BBC. Slurpy slurps on that meaty bad boy.”
“No, the company that you are frivolously suing wants to …wait you still don’t know what I’m talking about do you?”
“Yea…Yes, of course…but let’s just say I don’t.”
“FFS, dumb cunt, the British broadcasting corporation. You are suing them, remember?”
“Mmm mmm, bubba.”
“Oh FFS. Anyways they want you to appear in court. It’ll mostly just be you sitting down and scowling trying to look tough even though you’re an old fat useless feeble cunt that can hardly walk and are about as menacing as a fluffy sock.”
“I can do that. I’m in.”
“You won’t be able to fall asleep or shit yourself.”
“Mr Shitnugget, the BBC wants you to…”
“Bubba wants me? I like the BBC. Slurpy slurps on that meaty bad boy.”
“No, the company that you are frivolously suing wants to …wait you still don’t know what I’m talking about do you?”
“Yea…Yes, of course…but let’s just say I don’t.”
“FFS, dumb cunt, the British broadcasting corporation. You are suing them, remember?”
“Mmm mmm, bubba.”
“Oh FFS. Anyways they want you to appear in court. It’ll mostly just be you sitting down and scowling trying to look tough even though you’re an old fat useless feeble cunt that can hardly walk and are about as menacing as a fluffy sock.”
“I can do that. I’m in.”
“You won’t be able to fall asleep or shit yourself.”
“I’m out!”
Can’t tell if that is your original prose, or a transcript of a British satire sketch.
Either way, it is probably closer to reality than anyone should hope for.